Aug. 11th, 2017

elena23: (Default)
I posted a big long note on Facebook, unpacking some of my more difficult experiences as a cop. I'm always a little bit wary about doing this.

First and foremost, I don't want to ever be less than just to the victims of the crimes of which I am speaking. They and their families deserve peace and dignity. I don't reveal names, but sometimes they're easy enough to identify. How many times could it have happened that a man killed his wife and twin boys with a hammer? But my post was not public, and I think my friends will not pass it around.

Second...it's some horrible stuff. Do I really want to talk about that? Do people really want to see it? Don't we live in a world that is gratuitous enough?

Believe it or not, I actually held back on many of the worst details. I tried to walk a line. I think that people need to hear and understand what cops are going through. "Cumulative PTSD" isn't just a buzz word. Officers see horrendous things. Really really awful stuff that nobody should ever have to see. I feel like maybe I say this too often, or I'm too preachy, but I think it can't be underscored enough.

As I mentioned in my note there too, I don't even talk about the stuff that (for me) is the worst. Child sex crimes is a world of depravity and horror. Full stop. It makes homicide seem comparatively easy.

I don't know where I'm going with this. Mostly I'm just sort of letting stuff well out of my brain. I think I can't keep it contained forever.

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elena23

September 2017

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